Life

Lily Mae: Nine Months

Wow, a lot happened for Lily this month! Not only did she go through a major growth spurt, but she had TWO of her bottom teeth come in AND she’s rolling! I’ve pretty much stopped putting her in any kind of baby container and letting her roam (and roll) free. This little girl is going places!

She learned to clap but she prefers watching Mommy and Daddy do it. She also learned to wave and is associating certain sounds with certain movements. So when she claps she also claps and says yaaaaaay. 😂  She also went swimming for the first time. She got a fantastic little ice cream float from her grandma to use in the pool.

A lot of beautiful growth happened for Lily this month, and I’m so thankful that we’ve been able to continue with life at somewhat of a normal pace because this month has been a rollercoaster. We got into a car accident right before Mother’s Day, and while all three of us came out of it okay, it still left us shaken up pretty bad. Nothing was scarier than sitting in the passenger seat with my baby in the backseat sleeping only to hear my husband exclaim, “Oh my God” followed by a loud thud and the sudden cries of my baby.

Mother’s Day brings up a lot of sensitive emotions for me, and I think those emotions were heightened by the accident. Pair that with everything surrounding COVID, and it’s made me a little fragile. Some thoughts that have been coming up for me…

  • People don’t care about me anymore. They only care about my baby. This has really been made apparent based on how people interact with me on social media (only liking baby photos, not supporting me on anything else, etc.).
  • I feel used for my baby
  • My boundaries aren’t being respected as a mom
  • Feeling helpless as I try to do what’s best for me and my family. We’re trying to do the right thing by protecting ourselves and others during this pandemic, and it’s been so difficult with those closest to us challenging us on our values.
  • Trying to do it all and feel like I am not doing enough

All these feelings have made me want to hold tight to Lily and shut everything down. I’ve had a handful of days where I’ve considered not posting any more baby-related things because I don’t feel appreciated and respected as a person. I guess that’s the risk you take when you put your whole heart out on the web, huh?

Then I think about the support I do get from the wonderful community I’ve been apart of on my journey to Lily. And that’s what keeps me going. That and knowing there are people in my life that do genuinely care about me just as much as Lily. ❤ 

Things I’m Loving

HEVEA Bath Mat – Now that Lily is sitting upright in the bathtub without any type of container, we needed a non-slip bath mat for the tub. We’re loving this simple one which we can leave in the tub all the time.

Itzy Ritzy Teether Glasses – Lily loves to grab our glasses off our face, so when I stumbled upon these at Target, I HAD to get them! She loves them, especially with her teething in full swing!